So Narcissistic mother in law finally called to ask to speak to me. I was rather surprised by my timid reaction but I quietly refused to take the call. My anger was rather delayed as usual. Before long, I was losing sleep and getting more and more aggravated. I became enraged as to "who does she think she is! what makes her think she gets to decide when to or not to speak to me!" Then I started plotting as to how can I have my final say. On one of my sleepless night, I decided that it was a great idea to tape record my point of view, call her and press play. I started drafting my letter filled with insults but I didn't get very far. I planned on continuing my letter today but had an epiphany on my way to work. I came to realization that I am not going to be able to go anywhere with my letter. There is nothing I can do to remotely come close for her to realize her transgressions. Like all Narcissistic, she will  and has in the past distort the truth and use it against me. Reaching out to her in any shape or form merely gives her more ammunition to strike back.

I reached out to a friend, who is a mental health therapist about my feelings. He asked if my anger and frustration stem from my unresolved feelings towards my own Narcissistic mother.  I agree completely with him and from the very beginning I was well aware of it. But what came to light is that my strong need to attack her stem from my perceived second chance to strike back. An opportunity that I did not have with my own mother.

I also did quite a bit of reading online about how to deal with Narcissistic people. One article spoke about not playing games. In order to stop playing games with a Narcissistic, simply let the ball fall on the ground, don't pick it up, and walk away. Contact in any form, is like picking up the ball and throwing it to a Narcissistic. The ball is now on their court and now they get to choose what to do with it. Therefore, I will resume my no contact and be at peace with myself. For as long as I stay in no contact, I have the winning card.